“These Jokes are so bad I can’t Handel them.”

• Why are pianists fingers like lightning? They rarely strike the same place twice.

• Have you heard about the musician who leaves a message for his wife? it read “Gone Chopin, have Liszt, Bach in a Minuet.”

• B flat, E flat, and G flat walk into a bar. The bartender stopped them and said, “We don’t serve minors.”

• What do you call a snowman that plays the piano? Melton John

• What happens when you play Beethoven backwards? He decomposes.

• What do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft? A-flat minor.

• Why did the two pianists have a good marriage. Because they were always in a chord.

• To climb to the top of a tall piano, you must scale it.

• Piano is not my forte.

• Don’t date a piano technician, he’ll just string you along

• What do you call a fish musician?  A piano tuna. 

• Why couldn’t the athlete listen to her music? Because she broke the record!

• What makes music on your head? A head band!

• What type of music are balloons scared of? Pop music!

• What part of the turkey is musical? The drumstick!

• What is the musical part of a snake? The scales!

• Why did the girl climb the ladder to sing? She wanted to reach the high notes!

• What makes pirates such good singers? They can hit the high Cs!

• Piano Tuner: I’ve come to tune the piano. Music Teacher: But we didn’t send for you. Piano Tuner: No, but the people who live across the street did. 

• The Piano…you only have to tune this instrument twice a year but it costs over a hundred dollars.

• What’s brown and smelly and sits on a piano stool? Beethoven’s last movement

• A luxury boat sank and a passenger was holding on to a floating piano... All of a sudden, someone floats by sitting atop a floating cello and asks: “ May I accompany you?”

• Why couldn't Bach play the piano? It was baroque

• I can’t believe I was late to my own piano recital. I just couldn’t find my keys

• What did the Lawyer tell the defendant before they stepped into the courtroom? B-Sharp!

• What is the difference between a tuna, a piano and a pot of glue? You can tuna piano but you can’t piano a tuna.

• Wait what about the glue? Aha I knew you’d get stuck on that!

• When I was younger, I used to want to play the piano so badly. Turns out I’m A natural

• I’ve been teaching myself to play the piano by ear. It really bruised the side of my head.

• A Canadian was in the middle of building a piano castle when his friend came to check in on him and said…“Piano fort, eh?”

• A woman is like a piano. When she's not upright, she's grand!

• Do you remember the joke I told you about the piano movers spine? It was about a week back.

• What does a clock sign its name with? A time signature!

• What was Beethoven’s favorite cheese? Mozart-rella!

• What was Beethoven’s favorite social media platform? Face-Bach!